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by judy fraser on May 20, 2021

"I feel so much stronger, more capable and more content than I ever did pre-children. I think part of that comes from the self-effacing nature of motherhood."

Tell us your quick back story:

I grew up in the same Brisbane neighbourhood I raise my children in now. It has been a joy to watch them make friends with my childhood friend’s children. I was surprised by how much I came to value being surrounded by a longstanding network of friends and acquaintances while growing my own family.

My husband and I have three children, Isabel (7yrs), Harry (4yrs) and Chloe (8 months). When not mothering, I am an audiologist who works for a not-for-profit, Hear and Say. The majority of my work is with children who have been born deaf and receive a cochlear implant. I switch on and program the cochlear implant regularly, and watch the recipients grow up to have exactly the same spoken language as my little ones at home. I work part time so I feel very lucky to have both a job I enjoy and lots of time at home with my children.




Describe briefly what you thought motherhood would be like, before you actually became a mother!

I was confident that life wouldn’t change too dramatically (ha). I was also under the mistaken assumption that I could shape the temperament of my babies.

My first-born was surrounded by classical music and lavender oil and yet remained the most high maintenance new-born imaginable. I have come to realise their personalities are pre-formed and that discovering who you have been gifted is one of the best parts of the journey.


Did you have any ‘lightbulb moments’ about your sense of self after you became a mother?

I think there are moments when you are pregnant or after you have a baby where you can feel you have lost a bit of your sense of self.  I think there is something really special about Bonnie & Kind, as it works for your child but also it’s something you would choose for yourself and it makes you feel good.

I also think being kind to yourself and building a village of other families around you who are kind is so important.



Describe in a handful of words the woman you feel you are today.

Overall I feel so much stronger, more capable and more content than I ever did pre-children. I think part of that comes from the self-effacing nature of motherhood. Somehow in the act of giving more to others you become a much happier person in your self.


What piece of advice or learning, would you like to pass onto other mums?

Be kind. Be kind to yourself, your children, your partner and your friends. They will all fill your cup in return.


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